"My Heart's Contradiction"

Hesitation grows thick in my chest,

While thinking of you, which is what I do best.

Wallowing in what appears to be bliss,

I can’t stop reveling that wondrous kiss.

It appears to be happening all over again,

And it seems to have ceased before it truly began.

Although I would like to resist,

These feelings tend to persist.

Holding on to a love that is dead,

All these emotions fill me with dread.

Wishing more than anything to hold your hand,

But that is just something I could not stand.

Wanting nothing more than to leave this place,

Fulfilling the thought of erasing your face,

For my mind is made up,

And that is the case.

I realize this is all a contradiction,

But it highlights my decomposition.

With or without you I would be a mess,

But my love for you I still profess.